So I quit Big Al's today. I know what you're thinking. No, I didn't get that job at the IHOP. Why didn't I get hired there? Well, it certainly couldn't have been my resume. That was impeccable. Someone must've tipped them off over at personnel about my smoking history and my lung problems. And I have a pretty good idea who it was, too.
But, no matter. I didn't want to have to commute all the way to Climbers' Corners everyday anyway.
Besides, I've decided to get the heck out of Podunk while I still can. For starters, there isn't a single guy in this town I'm interested in. And I am really tired of taking orders for, and from, Big Al.
Or "Tiny", as his friends call him.
And I have a pretty good idea where he got that nickname from, but I'm just too much of a lady to say.
So I'm hitting the road. Got my bus ticket already. I'm gonna stay with my sister Pickles for awhile. She's got a great job plucking eyebrows at a salon in Beverly Hills. You would not believe what some people are willing to pay for that sort of thing.
Heck, I've been plucking mine for years. Maybe I could make a million dollars.
I'd settle for working in a place where people aren't always so rude.
Beverly Hills here I come.
Friday, March 9, 2007
Monday, March 5, 2007
Necessary Lessons
What a night. Never got off my feet for even a minute.
And hardly any decent tips, except for just one.
I'm more fried than Big Al's eggs.
Something strange, though. I got this folded up piece of paper, along with a nice fat tip, from some guy who came into the diner last night. He was a strange one. Couldn't quite figure him. He looked like a cross between Humphrey Bogart and Harrison Ford, only more intelligent than both of them.
I think he overheard me and Al arguing about something to do with religion. I can't really tell you what it was about. That's private. But this geezer, well I say geezer because when I looked him in the eyes he seemed really really old. But except for a mass of stubble, his face was as smooth as a baby's. Not a line in it.
But here's the thing. He left me a tenner, and all he had was a cuppa joe. Black, no sugar.
Didn't even finish drinking it.
Go figure.
This is what was on the piece of paper:
NECESSARY LESSONS
Do not advise those who are not in love.
The unloving, like the insentient, cannot understand.
Do not distance yourself from the wise,
But avoid the shallow instead.
The ungiving disappoint God.
They cannot see his face.
Do not waste time on drab pigeons,
Who consort with moles,
Who avoid the deep diving loon.
Falcon and King, each praises the other.
Even a small falcon is a falcon still.
And if you wash some dark stone for fifty years,
You won't really transform it.
The hidden sun changes appearance.
Some say it ceases to be.
It never does.
Yunus, don't be stupid.
Mix with the mature.
A fool who talks of spiritual things is still a fool.
~Yunus Emre, Turkey, ca. 1300
Oh yeah. One other thing.
He said his name was Sam.
And hardly any decent tips, except for just one.
I'm more fried than Big Al's eggs.
Something strange, though. I got this folded up piece of paper, along with a nice fat tip, from some guy who came into the diner last night. He was a strange one. Couldn't quite figure him. He looked like a cross between Humphrey Bogart and Harrison Ford, only more intelligent than both of them.
I think he overheard me and Al arguing about something to do with religion. I can't really tell you what it was about. That's private. But this geezer, well I say geezer because when I looked him in the eyes he seemed really really old. But except for a mass of stubble, his face was as smooth as a baby's. Not a line in it.
But here's the thing. He left me a tenner, and all he had was a cuppa joe. Black, no sugar.
Didn't even finish drinking it.
Go figure.
This is what was on the piece of paper:
NECESSARY LESSONS
Do not advise those who are not in love.
The unloving, like the insentient, cannot understand.
Do not distance yourself from the wise,
But avoid the shallow instead.
The ungiving disappoint God.
They cannot see his face.
Do not waste time on drab pigeons,
Who consort with moles,
Who avoid the deep diving loon.
Falcon and King, each praises the other.
Even a small falcon is a falcon still.
And if you wash some dark stone for fifty years,
You won't really transform it.
The hidden sun changes appearance.
Some say it ceases to be.
It never does.
Yunus, don't be stupid.
Mix with the mature.
A fool who talks of spiritual things is still a fool.
~Yunus Emre, Turkey, ca. 1300
Oh yeah. One other thing.
He said his name was Sam.
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